A girl I know once told me that time flies. She is currently is far far away . I wish time would fly by not because I want to get closer to father time, but to get closer to her so I can talk to her one more time. It's hard when somebody you (actually don't want to admit) care for is gone. It's even hard to swallow when you know that they are not into you as much as you're into them. They wonder why I think they are great. Maybe it's because they go around the world and help and the less fortunate. Or maybe it's because they are ONLY in their early twenties and have done so much with their life. Or maybe it's because when I talk to them I know they are righteous and you know that any man would be lucky to have them.. Yet I wonder why I care so much when I realize they could be right that we have nothing in common. Maybe they are right. It seems to happen to me a lot of times. I meet girls. I pine for them, but in the end it does not work out. Mainly because I don't believe in me or I believe I have to be a baller in order to be with a girl because NO girl wants a guy who has no ambition, passion, or desire.
I have ambition, desire, and passion, but when it comes to dating or being with girls, you have to feel pain. I don't know why you do. You just do. I have learned it's hard to let go of something you want so bad, but you know it's just you. It's hard to let go especially when it comes to girls. I think it's because when we meet somebody we think is special we think of the future and have hope that it's going to be great. In the end it's not. Sometimes I hurt girls and say what I think and why they are so frustrating or they say why they can't see me. Sometimes I get mad and wonder why I get so angry. Maybe I should be grateful that I spent time with somebody else's wife. Ha ha. Seriously it's just a experience that teaches you for the next chapter in life. In my life I don't think I'll ever meet that person. I feel that I blow my chances. Sit on the bench and do not make a move. Or I pine after one girl and focus on them when I don't take a look around me and see that there are other opportunities (dates).
Pining for girls is not a good thing. I'm no dating expert, but girls don't like guys who pine too much. They probably want to know you care, but there is a time and place for pining. It's when you are pining your hand with pine tar in baseball. Yeah!! I'm funny. Hire me Jimmy Fallon!
The moral of this is I guess it's better to live in the present than the past or future because when you do not live life in the present it creates despair and prevents you from moving forward. When all is lost or you think life is the pits, the best thing to do is think of what you can do for someone in this world.
A very wise man who works at a store called Target told me to forget about yourself and focus on others. He is right and you don't have to be anything to change somebody's life. All you have to be is their friend and let them know you care.
