I originally wrote a rant on how I hate my old school friends and then I realized what's the point in doing that. It's not like it gets me somewhere for writing that. Friends do let friends down sometimes and that is okay because no one is perfect. The same things goes with life sometimes it's great, while other times it just plain sucks. It's never easy and it's never easy doing the right thing. The world would want people to do what makes you feel good and they say it's okay sometimes to not do the right things.
Many times I have wanted to do the wrong thing, but my hope keeps me from doing the wrong thing. So does my belief in God and my church that I am a member of. It has never been easy. Sometimes doing the right thing gets us nowhere and a lonely night of doing nothing. I have done that for awhile now and I still wonder if it will ever get better. I am alone and isolated and I don't know why. I am a funny person, but I am not invited to anything ever. My real friends don't invite me anymore and it's hurts. I seem to not be able to find girls I actually want to date, that hurts as well because everyone needs to feel what it's like to love and even go on a date. That is partly my fault anyways because I just need to call a girl out. It may seem dark right now, but eventually it will all come to an end.
That is why I don't quit. I meet a lot of people who settle and I don't want to be like that. I don't want to work a crappy job. I want to do good things so I can make money and I want to help people because I observe people that I know need help. There are people I work with I want to help and there are girls that I actually really liked and wanted to help them . There is this one girl she always makes comments about herself that she should actually be on a date first or other things that bring her down. I just wish I told her that she is cute and that any guy would be dumb not to ask her out. I did not, but I am shy, but I guess that makes me dumb. I wished I did say something, but I was afraid to say something. I think we need to compliment people because everyone gets down and they do feel better after someone says things that raise them up.
I have noticed saying nice things to people really can make a difference. I remember this one time I told this person how great there where to me and they were shocked that I said something because I usually joke more than actually say how I truly feel. I told them and I think it made them feel better. I think we should look in the good people do, not the bad. I learned that from somebody else and I think it is a good way to think.
I do try to look in the good in people and then I realize it makes me feel better because I do get frustrated with some people sometimes, but when I do it gets me nowhere and it makes me worse because I am looking at the bad and not the good.
Maybe I should look in the good in life as well, even though it is not great sometimes. It is hard too, but I know things can get better. I just have to keep moving forward even though it is hard. I won't quit because I have come so far in my life not to quit. I hope it all works out and I hope that I can know what it's like to progress and accomplish the things I am supposed to accomplish.
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